Saturday, September 21, 2013

Reflect Me

I was given a copy of K.B. Webb’s novel, Reflect Me as an ARC. It was not in exchange for a review, but I loved it so much that I couldn’t imagine not giving one. I actually finished Reflect Me less than ten minutes ago, and I am still so in shock by the sheer brilliance that is this book that I had to pull out my laptop and write the review this second.

Where do I begin? Okay, here’s the synopsis:

If you’re looking for a story about a sweet, innocent virgin who rides off into the sunset with a reformed bad boy, then you’re looking in the wrong place.

Some people don’t get a happily ever after. Molly Scott is one of those people, and she knows it. With the kind of past that she has, and the secrets that she holds, she knows that even if she found Prince Charming, he wouldn’t want her. She refuses to dwell on her less than ideal situation though. This is her life, no point in complaining.

Logan Wade had his life planned out, until all his dreams came crashing down around him. Now, he’s come back to the town he swore he would never see again to start fresh. He has no plans to ever settle down again, that’s how he ended up back here in the first place.

When Molly and Logan meet, they are forced to rethink the lives they thought they knew and the futures they were so sure they wanted. Suddenly, Molly wonders if there is a better life outside of the hell she has built for herself, and Logan begins to rethink his resistance towards settling down again.

They say love conquers all, but Molly and Logan are about to find out that sometimes love just isn’t enough.

OKAY. Do you got that?

Firstly, this book starts off with a hell of a first line. “No one will ever want you, just remember that.” Let that sink in for a moment.

When I read that line, I was immediately floored. It knocked the wind out of me to be honest. I couldn’t believe what I was reading. It was amazing, it was heartbreaking, it made me miserable to see that jump off the page at me, but it was so fucking brilliant that I had to go get some coffee and my softest blanket to make myself comfortable to prepare for the roller coaster ride.

Molly has just given birth to her daughter and this is what her “boyfriend” (and I use that term loosely to describe Brian James) has to say to her. From the very first line, I could tell that this was not going to be like every other story about the troubled girl with her own personal version of Hell inside the walls of her home, and a cute little country boy who sweeps her off her feet. This is not that kind of story. It is intense, it is brutal, it is emotional, and I could actually feel the author’s words flying off the page and nestling themselves in my heart. I felt every single emotion with Molly. I felt her immediately react to Logan, I felt pain every time Brian talked down to her, and I felt an overwhelming sense of affection any time Molly’s best friend Wynee was in a scene.

I was hooked to this book, to put it simply. I was so angry with Brian—if I could have leapt into this book and kicked his ass, I totally would have—and I found myself falling for Logan. But more than that, I found myself smiling at the fact that even though Molly’s life is pretty much shit, she has a beautiful daughter who brings out the best in her, she has friends who adore her and stand by her side—I mostly smiled because I saw a lot of my friends’ qualities reflected in Wynee (I LOVE her!)—and she has music, which, really, is one of the universal languages that everyone understands.

I am very critical when it comes to books, especially ones that deal with emotional subjects like this one does. I very rarely give a 5 star review, but for this book, I wish I could give it more than just 5. Here’s why:
-I ugly cried. You seriously have to read those three words. I cry over everything, but rarely do I ugly cry. I ugly cried all over the place—red eyes, tissues, face all splotchy, a runny nose, and a headache afterward—because Logan and Molly’s story put me through the ringer.
-I had to hold my breath more than once.  There were so many shocks and turns in this book—and realistic ones! There weren’t twists just for the sake of being twists. They had me on the edge of my seat, and I thought I was going to have a heart attack.
-I considered throwing my phone across the room at least 6 times. You know that moment where you’re reading a book, and something happens and you’re all like, “What the FUCK just happened, and WHY?” Yeah, that happened at least 6 times. I don’t have an eReader, but I have the Kindle app on my phone, and I legitimately considered throwing it at the wall. When a book makes you so angry that you find yourself wanting to ruin your treasured electronic devices over it, it’s got to be good.
-I had a constant inner battle going on between reading faster because I wanted to see what would happen, and reading slower because I wanted to love this book a little bit more along the way, and cherish every single word even more.
-I was in love with Logan from the second he stepped onto the page.
-I felt the urge to hug Molly throughout the whole book. Molly is the most well-rounded character I have ever read. I simply adore her.
-I UGLY CRIED. Seriously, this is SO HUGE for me that it made its way onto my list twice.

But the best part of it is that it wasn’t all painful. It wasn’t all frustrating, it wasn’t all sad, or heartbreaking, or vomit inducing (I felt sick during every scene that featured Brian).

 It was sweet, and loving, and gentle, and it was realistic in the way that Molly and Logan’s love wasn’t perfect. It was far from it. Logan isn’t this perfect man with a perfect body and a gorgeous face and a panty dropping smile. Okay, he is, but he is flawed, and he’s got scars too. But Logan and Molly heal each other’s scars together, and they don’t do it within 48 hours. They do it over a slow progression of time, slowly letting each other in, slowly trusting each other more and more each moment they spend together. Molly and Logan are real.

Here are my favorite quotes:
“I can totally see you beating some random chick’s ass.” –Logan
“Don’t ever compare me to Brian James again. I’m not fucking kidding, Molly. I am nothing like him, and deep down you know it. You’re scared. I get it. Shit, I am too. I need to be in your life and I need you in mine. I don’t like being needy, Molly. It’s not a good quality for me to have, but with you, I am. I need you.” –Logan
“That’s what walls are for, Logan, to keep people out. Did you ever think that there’s a reason I have walls? That some pretty fucked up shit has happened in my life to make me this way. Do you really want a friend like that?” -Molly
“Damn, Molls, you can’t honestly still think that boy doesn’t want you! He said he wanted to eat you! What more does he need to do? Buy a billboard on 165? Would that get your attention?” –Wynee
 “Fuck me. If this is a dream, then I have no plans of ever waking up.” –Logan
“Molls, you know I love you, but sometimes, you’re fucking stupid.” –Wynee
“Checkmate, bitch!” –Molly
“I could have sworn I heard Logan say he loved me, but just like all the good things in my life, I knew it was only a dream.” –Molly

I believe I have a new favorite author, and rightfully so. K. B. Webb is so talented it’s almost unreal. I cannot accurately describe the love I have for this book, but it is definitely one that I will be reading again and again and again. 

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